Author Archives: F DOT LEONORA

Triangle

Oscar could not keep his hands off of Eliza, he even started to visit her at night while

Rafe was there and her husband was observant. He could tell when things picked up between her and Oscar, but the thing was that she and Oscar had been such a fixture as part of their relationship that there was nothing to even say about it now.

Oscar was equally observant, and he placed his hand on her thigh when he sat close to her. There was nothing actually sensual about his touch, but it spoke volumes. Now that she was starting to feel the baby move and she had a bit more of a bump, it was nice to have two very important men in her life taking care of her all of the time.

Rafe tried to be fair because they had opened their marriage, and now with all of the fallout with Chloe it meant that they had indeed opened Pandora’s box. That Oscar’s feelings had been opened again for Eliza, and it was not easy to be just friends with her.

When they were out he clung to her in such a manner, that people thought he was the father of the baby more than they thought Rafe was.

Oscar was difficult for Eliza to process though because he was still so close with Sally. Sally had lost a daughter, and now she wanted Oscar back in her life because she was in a lot of pain.

Grief was a hard thing. Eliza had had lost, and it was hard. Her father dying was a hard thing, but at least she got Jeanne out of it and that was something.

Jeanne was meeting them now, and because Eliza had told her what had been going on she was warm and receptive to all of them. Eliza was happy to have her sister with her–to take her out of this triangle.

More Wicked Wednesday here:

Deja Vu: Nichy

This month as Nyla wishes to flee–I thought we would take a look at her other incarnations from this series…

Nichy

Nichy woke up with her hand between her legs, breathless and gasping for air. Her body was damp, and she wondered if she had masturbated while she was asleep. With her eyes slit open, she pressed her lips to Tyler’s back. 

It was almost a thank you.

Watching him make out with Gavin had been so arousing, her clit twitched without her even touching it. Just her inner thigh rubbing against it, was enough to send her into a tailspin. Was it because she knew what each of those set of lips were like, why she was so especially turned on? Or that they were both in suits? Their suits in varied disarray, as they progressed into heavier and heavier petting. Gavin liked kissing–Nichy knew that. He liked his throat kissed which Tyler found out quickly—Tyler was very good at detecting hot spots…

She and Renee embraced harder, watching them. Tyler tugged at Gavin’s tie, like a leash to pull him closer to him so they could kiss deeper. Gavin’s fingers slipped in between the buttons of Tyler’s dress shirt, and Tyler pressed himself closer to Gavin. Gavin liked eye contact, so he pulled away and smiled at Tyler. Tyler never one to be distracted by a curveball, smiled back and rubbed his nose against Gavin’s.

“I can almost predict what they are going to do next!” she whispered to Renee.

“Me too! I know exactly what Gavin will do, he is more predictable than Tyler.”

Not moving her eyes from Gavin and Tyler—who had resumed kissing and pulled at each other’s clothes—Nichy took in what Renee said. Her clit tightened when Tyler unzipped Gavin’s pants. When Gavin unzipped Tyler’s pants, he gasped.

“You don’t wear underwear?” Gavin asked him.

“Nope, never have,” Tyler grinned. “Not even when I was a kid.”

Gavin caressed Tyler, and Nichy salivated as she watched him move in response to Gavin’s touch.

“You got to know Gavin very well then…” Nichy was almost surprised she had said this aloud, as she whispered to Renee.

“He was not exactly a stranger to me!” Renee giggled. “and I understand what you saw in him. Being in bed with him is dreamy!”

Nichy was not sure how to respond. Even though she loved Tyler, being with Renee and Gavin had been sweet moments that she was not sure she wanted to talk about. Would she have conversations with Gavin about how Renee tasted next? 

But then she was distracted by Tyler and Gavin again. They were just kissing and touching each other, but it was so damned hot! Gavin kept up with Tyler, kissing his neck which Nichy knew was Tyler’s hot spot. Tyler slumped against the couch, and caressed Gavin’s stomach as Gavin sucked at his neck. Nichy got so hot at the idea of him leaving a mark there…

When she remembered this, she looked at Tyler’s neck in the dark right then and could see the smudge of a bruise on his neck which she kissed over and over again.

More Masturbation Monday here:

Out of Character

Oscar was a permanent fixture suddenly. He came to see her often in the morning before he went to work, sometimes working from her apartment so he could see her and make sure she was okay.

Eliza told him he did not have to dote on her–she was not porcelain and she would be fine. But Oscar was more attentive than ever—Rafe was the same—she felt very loved.

It was jarringly out of character however when Oscar was with her one morning, and he caressed her face. He had always been affectionate with her, but he did not stop there.

He kissed her, and she kissed him back. She had not been expecting the kiss, but she received it like a sacrament. His lips were warm and sought more from her than ever before. His hand slipped under her robe, and touched her bare skin. Eliza gasped as he touched her breasts and stomach, wondering if he could feel the changes she saw and she pulled her robe together.

“Oscar,” she groaned softly, her body wanted more but she was afraid of what more would mean.

“I need you Eliza,” he groaned, the sound of his voice made her ache with his loss and his desire. “Please let me…”

Her eyes dissolved into liquid, as she did not move to stop him and he pushed her robe off of her shoulders. Her nipples were hard, and the ache between her legs gripped her with desperation.

She could not say no to this–to him now. Desire and friendship were too heady for her to do anything, as he lifted her breast and kissed it graciously like a hand looking up at her.

Her body quivered with the fever he created in her. She was not sure she had ever lusted for him like this before. Even in the very beginning the first time she saw him in Paris, and they were inseperable…walking past a lingerie store was like a fire and made them want to make love right outside of it. Even then she was not sure that she felt the fever that she felt now as Oscar got on top of her on the couch and that was the only thing she wanted in the entire world…

More Wicked Wednesday here, more Friday Flash here:

Musings via @loveisafetish

Nikki and I made friends via Twitter–one of the things I love about social media. Polka dots was a shared love! I love that she inspires me daily–even more after reading this guest post she wrote. She motivates herself, and makes me want to be and do more!

Get inspired!!!

Posting the 281st photo to my #365photochallenge thread on Twitter, I caught myself feeling disappointed and bittersweet about being so close to finishing my year long photo project. Who even am I? What the fuck was that about? 

https://twitter.com/loveisafetish/status/1182331905485631489

 

The answer is pretty clear. This project has been beneficial on so many levels. At its most basic, accomplishing  any positive, daily task is good for your mental health.  Add that it’s something that makes me feel sexy, fun and creative? It’s been a fantastic cocktail of awesomeness. 

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The theory is that the key to healing, growth or learning is to find something that works for you, personally, because we all learn differently. This photo project is an excellent example of that. It’s been difficult, frustrating and downright pissed me off to have to deal with weekly feelings of god damn it I’m too fucking busy and have a toddler and I do not have time or inspiration for this shit — oh wait, there’s a delightful sunbeam to take a nude picture in, score! And I think that’s what’s kept me going. It’s a challenge, but an attainable one that I have control over.

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Not only has it made me feel remarkably better about my body and sensuality, but it’s made me pay attention and learn how the natural light looks in every room of our home at every time of the day. It’s allowed me to appreciate the way the light falls on my curves from different angles.  It’s required me think outside of the box in terms of location, pose, color, outfit, makeup, varying factors all playing a part in forcing myself to expand upon what I know to be able to take a unique photo every day, for hundreds of days. 

 

It’s forced me to get myself dolled up, dressed in lingerie and in a frame of mind that I might not have been able to access if I wasn’t so motivated to stick with this project. Weekly prompts, like Violet’s Lingerie is for Everyone and Molly’s Sinful Sunday have been my saving grace. Giving me a reason every week to try just a little harder, to participate, to put myself out there. All things that I struggle to do without a nudge. 

I was incredibly proud of myself for sticking with this project for the first week, then month, it seemed like no time and I was writing about hitting my half a year mark in July. Now, with only 80 days left, I’m already pretty certain I will continue my project again next year. Why wouldn’t I? It seems like a no brainer to continue doing something that genuinely affects my mental health in an incredibly positive way. 

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You can follow along with my photo project here, and access the NSFW versions here or my Dropbox! 

Lost Doll via @fireandhoney

Nyla’s breasts were crushed, as she lie on her stomach. Andres liked taking her from behind, and usually she liked it too…but she had that feeling she had when she wanted to escape her life…

Reincarnate herself.

This time she felt stuck because she was in charge of Graham’s business, and there were people who depended on her. Other than that she would escape, she would run faster than the speed of light.

Lulled by the sensation of Andres thrusting in and out of her, Nyla closed her eyes.

“Have you ever wanted to escape yourself?” she questioned mid thrust.

“Like you Nusch?” he answered.

She felt a shiver, she felt her entire body go cold and stiff even while Andres continued to pound her. His balls crushing against her, like her breasts crushed into the mattress.

Nyla rubbed her eyes.

“Where do you want to go Nichy?” When she stiffened even more, Andres caressed her spine. “There is nothing to be afraid of my love, nothing at all. Graham told us about you in order to protect you in case you needed to escape…again.”

Rolling into her back, Nyla looked up at Andres.

“And to fuck me?” she got up from the bed, and Andres moved like a panther behind her.

“Ny—”

She wrapped herself with her robe, and saw her wild eyes in the mirror behind Andres.

“And you thought it was a good idea to get intimate with me? To get this close? And that time that Damaris came here, you should have been protecting me not about to fuck me!”

Andres leaned against the wall.

“I definitely knew better than to fall in love with you but it was unavoidable. Seeing you lying around all the time completely nude sunbathing, acting like we did not even see you when you are impossible to miss…”

Nyla saw her eyes soften in the mirror, but she was not completely softened.

“You should have told me earlier. I do not know your secrets.”

“But you do. Graham has files on the three of us.”

“The three of you?”

“We were in the streets, ran away from our foster home. The foster parents wanted us for the benefits and nothing else. Paulo and I were doing what we had to do to protect Gráinne. He and Gráinne fell in love, and the three of us just had each other’s backs.”

“So you never answered—have you ever wanted to escape yourself?”

Andres stood up straight, and looked at her.

“No,” he breathed. “But I am prepared to do whatever I need to, to make you more comfortable. Including to escape…”

“Will you come with me?”

“I can’t.” Nyla sighed, she ached for flight. “The three of us would take over and then you would be free to do whatever you wanted. To do whatever you wanted to do.”

It was not the first time Nyla would have left people behind, and honestly she felt like a lost doll…Her anger brimmed as she flung herself on the bed, and Andres followed her.

More Masturbation Monday here:

gorgeous image via Violet Fawkes

Retro: Full Circle

This retro post is a perfect example of all the complexities of Eliza’s relationships…

Eliza was happy that she was going to meet Rafe at his sister’s gallery opening. Meeting him there, she could blame her state of mind on jetlag and not having eaten. Quickly leaving her luggage at the coat check, she had barely walked into the space before she was handed a glass of champagne she gladly accepted.

“Eliza!”

Fiona rushed to hug her. Eliza enjoyed the genuine warmth from her sister-in-law-to-be. Fiona was the artist her parents had not expected to have in the family, and the reason why they and Rafe tried to mold Eliza into the daughter they had really wanted.

She was perfect by their standards and Rafe’s.

Her husband-to-be stood behind his sister, his appraisal of her was appreciative and she felt placated. Her back in New York dress was one Rafe had selected himself. As soon as Fiona let her go, Rafe moved forward, caressed her hip and took her in his arms.

“I missed you,” he breathed behind her ear. She smiled more so because she was ticklish there as opposed to returning the sentiment.

She was not unhappy to see Rafe, but it was not as easy this time to leave Oscar…

Oscar, she whispered his name over and over in her head since she learned it, saying it to herself when she thought about him which was often.

Paris had been Oscar and Eliza. Oscar was in Shanghai now without her, and she was in New York with Rafe. She looked up at Rafe, into his eyes that studied her as if he was making sure there was nothing different about her. He closed his eyes, and pressed his lips to her forehead. Later when they were alone, she knew that the darkness in those eyes was going to be her very sensuous reality and she was very eager for that. To learn him again, her hands pressed to the expanse of his wide chest before she buried her face there. His lips were on the top of her head, as he caressed her face and pushed her hair away from her cheek.

Her eyes were glazed as she stared at the Francesca Woodmanesque photos that Fiona had filled the gallery with. It was clear that Woodman was an influence on her, Fiona’s work was a happier expression of that style. Champagne and delicacies flowed about them, as they strolled through the gallery.

“Fiona, this is gorgeous,” Eliza said, still in Rafe’s embrace.

“You always know the right thing to say,” Rafe whispered to her after his sister walked away.

The sepia photos were lovely, and Fiona was young, fearless and not afraid to use her body as an instrument.

Eliza wished that she had that kind of confidence.

Rafe’s parents appeared around a gallery corner and kissed her before they kissed their own daughter. Eliza had that kind of relationship with his parents. She had now come full circle from her accidental transgression.

This was where she belonged.

“How was Paris?” Rafe’s mother asked her beaming.

“Paris is Paris!” she exclaimed brightly, as Rafe squeezed her.

“It was more lovely while you were there,” he said.

She closed her eyes as Rafe kissed the tip of her nose. His mother continued beaming,

“You lovebirds! Let’s go have dinner, we have reservations close by…”

Dinner was pleasant talk about Paris reinvented by Eliza without mention of Oscar. Fiona was silent all throughout, having expressed dismay at her show.

“It was a lovely show Fiona, I am not sure why you are so miserable,” her mother said to her.

“I need inspiration Mother. Everything I am doing seems so homogeneous…”

“So you are saying you have come full circle with your art?” her father asked.

“You want to travel again?” Rafe asked with weak patience for his younger sister.

Fiona played with the gooey chocolate cake she had ordered, not looking at anyone at the table.

“I have only really ever gotten grants to work in Europe. There is a grant I could get in Shanghai…Eliza, you speak some Mandarin don’t you?’

Eliza choked.

“Yes, I can write a bit too.”
“You said you wanted to go somewhere exciting for your next vacation. Maybe if Rafe will loan you to me, we could go to Shanghai I want to visit anyway. I have a friend there who is an artist, and the scene there is kind of ambitious and if one of us speaks the language…”

“Of course Rafe will loan Eliza to you Fiona,” Rafe’s mother eyed Rafe and Eliza strongly which Fiona could not see because she was sitting next to her.

Rafe and Eliza were silent. She was going to be the obedient faux daughter, and go to Shanghai with Fiona.

Oscar, she almost said out loud, but caught herself as she exhaled a whoosh of air to disguise the sound of his name.

Home later with Rafe, he took off his tie.

“This would be the second place that I cannot come with you. Paris, now Shanghai…”

He held his tie, and opened his shirt.

“I can still say no,” she said walking over to him, putting her hands on his chest.

She wanted him to tell her no, wanted him to tell her not to go. She would have listened.

His dark eyes appraised her.

“I cannot disappoint my parents, they will not let Fiona go without you, and that means Fiona will go however she has to. We are a family, sometimes we have to make sacrifices…”

She nodded, looking down, he raised her chin so she looked up at him and kissed her.

“She can borrow you, but you are mine. My perfect girl…”
Eliza looked up at the cracks on the ceiling, moaning as he kissed her and again on a deep whoosh of exhaled breath, she hid the name she almost moaned and thought of Shanghai…

More Wicked Wednesday here:

Damaris in Paris

The nice part of Paris was that Damaris never felt alone, when Jared was not with her. Carole was even with her sometimes, she had been in Paris with her sister so many times. It was a magical place for them.

A sexy place.

Gui never told anyone that the two of them had met before her sister died. Damaris was always someone’s little dirty secret, after all there was what had happened with Harry…

Suddenly she was cloaked in the shadows of her past life. She had to take a deep breath, and wondered if she was feeling regularly anxious or if she was having an anxiety attack.

Or just remembering what had happened with Harry. She had slept with him willingly, and he had seemed to care about her at first…

She covered her eyes with her hands, and when she looked up she saw Jared. He was waiting where he had said he would be waiting for her.

“You okay?” he asked, and put his arm about her.

She nodded, but she did not mean it and felt disoriented.

He took her to a place where the spoken French swirled around them.

Jared said he wanted to be a voyeur with her, he wanted to just look.

With her.

As soon as they walked into the lounge there was a couple in a sixty-nine position. Her ass was spread over his face, and he licked her like she was the best inverted cone he had ever had, while she alternately kissed and licked his shaft reverently.

When they walked deeper in, there were two elegantly dressed men with tuxedos and tails, with their pants around their ankles revealing sock garters, kissing with a seeming thirst they could not quench.

Two women dressed equally as elegantly kissed as well, their hands under each other’s dresses so their garters were revealed. Within sometime, the couples swapped.

Damaris was literally throbbing between her legs, the sensory overload from watching was almost unbearable but too sweet to deny.

She had told Jared she liked to watch. Damaris remembered the mirrored room in their hotel where she and her sister had entertained Gui.

Two for the price of one. But Carole fell in love with him, and everything changed..

Damaris’ life had changed so much since Carole died. Her eyes blurred out the sexy scenes before her with liquid grief…

More Masturbation Monday here:

paris via wikipedia

Whenever I Call You Friend

It was not awkward, but Eliza noticed all of the differences in her body now that she was pregnant. She had had a lot of nausea in the first month and was tired all of the time. Those were the symptoms that made her check to see what was going on with her.

She and Rafe had not been trying to have a baby—especially not when she was sleeping regularly with Oscar. They used protection of course, she only did not use protection with Rafe. So when she realized she was pregnant she knew her baby had to be for her husband and that was the way it should be. Rafe said that he did not even question, because any baby she had would be theirs.

Looking at her naked body in the mirror, after having made love to her husband, Eliza studied everything new about herself. Her breasts were fuller, her nipples were darker and her eyes were brighter. There was a suggestion of a line from her navel to her mound, and it awed her to see all of the changes that were happening to her body…

…because of her baby.

The doorbell rang, and she wrapped her robe about herself. She was not expecting anyone. She had begun doing some small work remotely, but there were no meetings planned.

When she saw Oscar through the peephole, she swallowed.

Rafe had just left for work, and she was not sure what to say to Oscar. She had already told him the baby was not his, but then she paused and knew he was still grieving Chloe. When she opened the door, he greeted her with a warm kiss and her robe opened. He looked down at her body.

“You are beautiful,” he said, as she tied her robe about her waist.

Her eyes were warm when she looked at him,

“Do you want some coffee?”

He shook his head,

“I just wanted to see you, to see a friend.”

Eliza nodded, as much as she loved him she was a little afraid what he wanted from her as a friend.

More Wicked Wednesday here:

friendship via wikipedia

Striped via @May_Matters

Damaris was dangling from the bed in only her fancy striped tights and nothing else. Paris had been amazing so far—even more amazing than she remembered it from the countless times she had been there before.

The striped tights came from the store near their hotel–Damaris was surprising Jared because when she looked at his phone she accidentally saw a candid photo of herself that he had taken of her. He was scrolling randomly, but she recognized herself. She did not know he was taking photos of her, so she decided to surprise him when he walked into their hotel room.

“Damaris porn,” he said as he loosened his tie, knelt and gathered her breasts with his hands upon seeing her sprawled on the king-size bed.

She sighed deeply from his touch. He knew exactly how to touch her, their time in Paris made them intimate in ways she had not expected at all. In New York she felt something different with him, but in Paris together all of the time she got to know things about him that she did not know.

How she discovered that he took secret photos of her legs…

Jared pressed her breasts together, kneaded them and Damaris moaned with the pleasure from the release of it. He caressed her nipples, and she was so tight between her legs she thought she would burst.

Fully dressed in his suit, he lie alongside her—his head at her feet. Damaris saw the bulge in his pants, and caressed his calves absently. He rubbed her feet, and it felt nice. She closed her eyes and moved into his touch, her body felt fluid from when he massaged her breasts but now even more so. It was like she was melting, as he caressed her foot.

But it was while he had her pinky toe in his hand that Damaris felt a rush of pleasure much further up than just at her toes. Her toes curled as Jared massaged her ankle and pinky toe in tandem, making her feel like she wanted to come. She was capable of nipple orgasms—but a foot orgasm? Even as she pooh poohed the idea, that was just what happened. The flood of sensation that went up to her groin finally exploded and she buried her face in his calves as she came. Jared rubbed his cheek against the sole of her foot, and she gasped as she had aftershock pleasure from her orgasm.

Damaris was limp as a noodle, and wondered what more this man was going to take from her and how much more would she willingly give to him?

More Masturbation Monday here:

sexy legs via May More

Bunny

Rafe looked at the pictures of Chloe on the cover of her funeral program–it looked like a picture he would have taken of her when they went away together. She looked so vivacious and full of life.

The body that he viewed looked beautiful but lacked her life and vivaciousness. Eliza held his hand while they stood together at her coffin.

“You caused her death!” Sally screamed suddenly, and Rafe turned around to look at her. Oscar was sitting next to Sally, and held her close to him but she continued to scream. “She was talking about you before she died! Her head was all filled with you! You!”

Rafe looked down at Chloe once more, and then with Eliza they walked to her pew.

“I am sorry for your loss,” Rafe stated simply.

“You killed my daughter!!!” Sally pummeled her fists against his chest, and all Rafe could do was take it. Oscar pulled Sally away from him, and Eliza said,

“Stop it Sally, this not the way to say goodbye to your daughter.”

Sally stopped punching Rafe to stare coldly at Eliza.

“Both of you get out of here.” Eliza looked at Rafe and nodded.

The walked down the hall in the chapel. Others from a nearby funeral looked at them.

Rafe still felt Sally pounding his chest when he and Eliza got into their car. Eliza held his hand, and he closed his eyes. Lifeless Chloe stayed with him. He remembered her scampering away like a bunny after they skinny dipped. Her bright eyes filled with what he now knew was love.

He squeezed Eliza’s hand as they sat in the car. He wanted her away from Sally for sure. Sally would have lost her mind if she had seen Eliza—really seen Eliza–who was not really showing yet but there was a slight curve about her stomach. Their baby was barely visible but there, and he did not want Sally to injure the mother of his unborn child.

***

Oscar sat next to Sally. They were reunited in grief, but it was still such a hard time being with her post Chloe when all he thought in his head like a mantra was Bunny, Bunny, Bunny. He used to call Chloe Bunny as a pet name, and now she was lying in the coffin that he and Sally stared at long after the funeral director closed it.

Death was so final, the opposite of birth.

Birth, he swallowed hard as he thought it. Eliza looked so different, even if she had not told him she was pregnant he would have been able to guess there was something new about her. He knew her that intimately. It was not his baby, she assured him why she told him right away and calmly so there was no confusion.

“Besides, I am Rafe’s wife and he said any baby I have is his baby.”

Oscar swallowed hard again.

He lost Chloe and the chance to be a father within a week, he felt like a walking void. This swap of partners with Eliza had been a black hole.

More Wicked Wednesday here, more Friday Flash here: