RETRO: JACKPOT

“He’s so in something with you,” Jeanne had said looking at Eliza.

“We’re just in an awkward place, I mean we recently started sleeping with each other again so he kind of expects that from me? I mean he even wondered if the baby is Rafe’s,” Eliza stated calmly.

Eliza was not going to make any apologies, but her baby was Rafe’s. She told him that the baby was his—he said the baby was his because they were married and that was what she wanted but it was very possible that the baby could be Oscar’s.

There was something poetic in that because she loved Oscar, but she had not chosen him. She had married Rafe. She was happily married too, everything she had ever feared with Rafe she now saw was a bit unnecessary.

Everything that had happened between all of them, and she had chosen Rafe. Jeanne looked at her, and Eliza smiled.

“Who do you love more?” Jeanne questioned her while sipping her water. Eliza bit her lip, there was no answer for that question. Her love for either was boundless…she had hit the jackpot either way, with either man.

More Wicked Wednesday here.

Love in Autumn

Jeanne walked home with Terrence.

It was the first time they had been together since they had taken care of Bibi. They took care of Bibi a lot for Eliza, and she loved it because she was her aunt. Jeanne could be with her–and return her. But it meant that there was time that she could not be with Terrence alone and enjoy what they had the way her sister was enjoying her time with the men she was with.

She had fought with Eliza over Terrence because he was Eliza’s first. But then they fell in love, and Eliza was not happy about it but now it was understood that he was hers and that they would be together. They were established. Jeanne enjoyed the weight of the ring that he put on her finger when he proposed to her. When they walked to their apartment, it was dark, but the autumn leaves were still bright with their autumnal gold color.

As soon as they walked in, she kissed him. Terrence kissed her with equal passion, his hands on her waist and slipping under her blouse. Jeanne placed her hands on his to stop him.

“I want you,” she said as he kissed her throat. “As slow as possible. I do not want to rush a thing. Let me.”

She stood back and unbuttoned her blouse very slowly. His gaze on her fingers was like fire, and she unbuttoned even slower because she did not want to rush anything as she had said. When she was done unbuttoning, she folded her shirt neatly and placed it on a chair. Slowly reaching behind her, she slid down the zipper and tugged gently to pull her skirt down over her hips. She stood in a very lacy bralette and full coverage lacy panties because she did not care if she had a pantyline or not. Terrence started to unbutton his shirt, and she walked over to him slow as syrup and put her hands over his. 

“Slowly, as slow as you can.”

The entire night was like that. They moved like syrup and made love like they were drizzled in it. The softness of his kisses burned all over her, and Jeanne felt like Eliza had a genuine love experience with two men, as had one with just one man.

It was just as fine.

In the morning, golden leaves were pressed to the windowpane the way she was pressed to Terrence.

Autumn so beautiful.

 

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Home Cooking

Jeanne walked into Eliza’s apartment with Bibi and Terrence. Terrence squeezed her hand as they did. Eliza donned a fancy apron edged in ruffles, and Rafe and Oscar were both in the kitchen as if they were sous chefs to her in aprons as well. 

Her sister scooped up her daughter, who wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck. Jeanne knew what a sweet feeling that was since she and Terrence had been the recipients of several of those hugs while they took care of her.

Jeanne could not explain something about the look and feel of the apartment, which made her look at Eliza with a knowing glance even though she did not know anything.

The apartment was redolent with the scent of home cooking. She had had meals with Eliza before and knew she was an amazing cook, so she was very happy to sit down and have the linguini and clams her sister had made.

Rafe poured her a glass of wine and showed off the bottle of a favorite wine that she liked when she was there previously. She smiled at Terrence, as Oscar put a basket of garlic bread on the table. Jeanne took a piece, and raised her eyebrow at Eliza.

Dinner was amazing. Eliza picked Bibi up as she was fell asleep on her lap. Jeanne insisted on helping to clean, but neither Rafe nor Oscar would let her. So she squeezed Terrence’s hand, and greeted her sister when she walked out of Bibi’s room.

“Such a domestic and lovely scene here,” she said, putting her arms across her chest and smiling at Eliza in the way she did when as a journalist, she needed to know more from someone than what they were telling her when she had a hunch.

Jeanne could tell Eliza knew exactly what she was up to. She took her hand after she closed her niece’s bedroom door.

They walked to the window on the other side of the apartment. Eliza was glowing in the moonlight as she confessed.

“The three of us had a very good night.”

Jeanne knew her eyes must have been the size of saucers, as she smiled at her sister,

“You’re glowing.”
“I’ve never felt so loved before. I was with two men who love me and who I love. I spent the night with them, and I have never felt happier.”

Jeanne hugged her sister, happy that they both felt so much love from the men in their lives.

 

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Regrets

The three of them woke up the next morning, a tangle of limbs. Eliza had no regrets about the night before, it was something she had always fantasized about specifically with the two men she was with. But she never imagined that those two men would be open to making that come true for her.

It turned out she was a very lucky woman.

She was led naked to her bedroom by Oscar and Rafe. She and Oscar had made love in her and Rafe’s apartment before but rarely in this room, so she squeezed his hand as she wondered how he felt about walking into the room with her and Rafe. Even though Rafe was her husband, Oscar had become a very cohesive part of their dynamic lately.

Oscar was clearly not phased at all as he pressed her to the wall of the bedroom and kissed her mouth while Rafe kissed her neck. It felt like they had choreographed what they were going to do to her because they repeatedly and fluidly touched her in sync.

After leading her to the bed, the choreography continued and she ended up in the middle of a two-man sandwich. It was messier than she imagined it would have been and sexier than anything she had ever been stuck in. Kisses rained about her shoulders and above, as she gripped both of their thighs to penetrate her deeper. When she came, she felt like she passed out for a millisecond before she got up–before the three of them got up and went to the master bath. Rafe seemed like the master of the house as he turned on the water faucet of their walk-in shower. Eliza followed her husband like she always followed him and Oscar followed her. 

When she woke up the next morning, their perfumed bodies were a tangle and that was the most intimate part of the threesome for Eliza. It was the comfort that she felt being with two men who she loved and who loved her so much that they were willing to share her. They joined together just to pleasure her without having any desire to be intimate with each other. But they worked together to make her fantasy come true. Lying tangled up in the reality of that, was the most pleasure she could have received and she had no regrets about her night.

 

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Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

The Real World

This did not feel like the real world.

“This was what you wanted, right?” Rafe said. “This is what you want?”

It aroused Eliza even more that Rafe was asking for consent when she had been talking about this for such a long time. 

“Yes,” she said. 

Oscar ushered her by her hips to their car that was waiting not far away. Rafe held her hand. Once inside the car, each of them put their hand on her thighs. Their reflection in the driver’s window showed the three of them looking very demure. What the driver could not see was that her dress was completely up and both Rafe and Oscar were fingering her. 

It was easy for Eliza to look nonplussed because she had done a lot of stuff like this in public before and her poker face was part of her charm. No one would ever have guessed that she was on the brink of orgasm as they approached the front of their building. She adjusted herself and walked out of the car her hands in both Rafe’s and Oscar’s. When they got to their apartment, it was on as soon as the door was open since their daughter was with her aunt.

Nothing like this had even crossed her mind, she had not expected that this was going to happen. Her dress was up over her hips and both men were caressing her and trying to get her dress over her head. While her dress was moving up over her head, she swooned and someone grabbed her by the waist. 

She had worn nothing under her dress because she did not want any of the lines undergarments would have created. Rafe pulled her onto his lap, kissed her neck, and caressed her breasts. Oscar massaged her feet. Eliza closed her eyes, between the two of them they knew all of her erogenous zones, and with the wine she had had to drink she drifted off from the pleasure they created in her.

It felt like another world.

 

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Dark Street

After they left the gallery, Eliza walked with Oscar and Rafe. It had been interesting to be with them for the entire night, and she loved it. Rafe was very generous in letting Oscar be around a lot. There was so much history between the three of them, but at this point they eased into a familiar threesome. Attending events like this opening together.

Eliza would never have imagined that a man she met when she was not even sure that she wanted to get married would be in her life still, and the man that she had doubted that she wanted to marry would let that man be in her life.

Bibi was with Jeanne, who was now engaged to Terrence. At some point, Eliza was not happy about her sister being with a man that she has been with, but now she was nonplussed about it. She had her own intimate life to be worried about. 

As they walked down a dark street and alley nearby, Rafe and Oscar cornered her. Eliza was a little tipsy, but she was aware that she was being surrounded by her two men. There were late nights when she had conversations with Rafe and Oscar in their apartment while drinking wine, that she would tease them both and say that she fantasized about being with both of them at the same time.

Rafe was raising Bibi as her father because Eliza was married to him, but Oscar was around all of the time. For the chance that he could have been Bibi’s father, they wanted him to spend a lot of time with her. It also was because he wanted to spend time with Eliza.

She teased them about both being with her at the same time. On this dark corner, tipsy and with both of them tipsy as well they stood as a triangle on the corner.

Taking a deep breath, Eliza was not sure what was going to happen in the dark alley.

Rafe kissed her, and breathless she returned his kiss with fire. Oscar settled behind her, hands on her hips and kissing her neck. Was this going to happen here?

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Film Star

Eliza watched as Alessandra walked from the back of the gallery, still tightly holding Leon’s hand. They looked at each other, and for the first time in a long time, there was no animosity in how they looked at each other. Eliza wondered if finally the war was over and they would be able, if not to be friends, that they would at least be able to be at these events and not feel awkward.

But that would be determined later, maybe at the after-party. For now, Alessandra was the movie star of the art world. Everyone wanted a piece of her. Her new pieces were dark and then filled with light. It was such an intimate view of her emotional world, much of which Eliza had already witnessed when she semi-stalked her on Instagram.

The lighter pictures were coming to light now, pictures of parts of her body and Leon’s body in the sunlight. There were so many sunlit photos, and the lights in the gallery perfectly complemented her photographs.

Her PDA with Leon was also compelling. People were asking about him. Leon was so classy that he still demured and made sure that people were paying attention to Alessa.

She deserved it. The work and the evolution of the work were staggering. Eliza wanted to tell her, but she did not feel that she wanted to rock the boat. She did not want to assume anything.

Later, she froze when she was in the ladies’ room and saw Alessa walk in behind her. Alessa smiled, and she smiled in return. Alessa walked to the sink to pull her lipstick out of her purse, which Eliza was doing as well. She remembered the time that Alessandra had made herself up so well because she was trying to seduce her, and she still felt guilty about that because she had never wanted to hurt Alessandra.

“I never meant to hurt you,” Eliza said and smeared lipstick on her face when she did.

“I know now,” Alessandra said. “I know. When I was away with Leon, I learned so much about myself and things that I thought. Let go of a lot.”


“He is an amazing man.”

“He is. I never realized that we loved each other as much as we did. But he was always there, and this time…” she looked at Eliza deeply. “I am not with someone to make me feel better about not being with someone else.”

“I would hope not,” Eliza said. “He doesn’t deserve that.”

“I would never hurt him,” she said and smacked her lips. “He wants me to make nice with you, and for him, I will.”

“I will always be your friend.”
Alessa looked at her with a poker face that was not off-putting but still did not let her know what she felt about her. But it was nice not to think that Alessa wanted to remove her like a chess piece off of the board at last.

She had been as nice as she could to her for Oscar and Rafe.

The things they did for the men in their lives.  

 

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Promotion

Leon’s sudden promotion from friend to boyfriend had been a surprise to Alessandra.They had been living in a bubble with their relationship since they went upstate, and now they were on display for the first time. The gallery opening was their first formal event.

Looks of surprise did not go unnoticed from people like Rabekkah who definitely was stunned because before being a couple they almost gave off a brother and sister vibe. They would even set each other up with other people—as he had done for Rabekkah and her.

But squeezing his hand and looking up at him, Alessandra felt more secure about being with him than she had any of the previous people she had been with lately. She knew he loved her and she loved him. They came together as a couple already loving each other and now they were in a deeply loving relationship which made her feel like she was on top of the world. But she was uneasy on the top of that very world as she looked as if down on her most recent lovers…well people she was in some sort of love with attending this opening.

As she walked toward Eliza, Rafe and Oscar, she steadied herself. Oscar looked at her with that deer caught in the headlights look that he always gave her after they broke up, but he was not her focus. She looked at Eliza, who looked frozen in her beauty beside her husband Rafe, who looked at her and Leon.

“Eliza,” Leon said, breaking the silence and Alessandra breathed a sigh of relief. His voice made her feel relaxed and she squeezed his hand.

“Leon,” Eliza answered, as he moved to kiss her cheeks.

Leon nodded to Rafe, and Alessandra held his hand tighter pressing her face to his chest. He made her feel so safe and protected. All of the obsessive emotions she had felt before were not there. She was just so happy with Leon and the feelings he made her feel that she had never felt before in such an acute way.

They walked past everyone to the very back where they were alone. In the darkness she felt his hands touch her everywhere, and Alessandra wanted to be dominated by him all the more.

 

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Ambition

Leon was overwhelmed by Alessandra. He did not understand how a woman like her did not understand how amazing she was. Everything she touched turned to gold. As he walked with her, everyone looked at her like she was a goddess. Her long, dark hair was out and she wore a short black jumpsuit that was a glamorized version of the clothes that she wore when she was posting on Instagram days before. He had accompanied her before to gallery openings, but this time they were together and it was a very different situation for him.

It felt different to be together, to be there with her. She held his hand tightly, and he held hers equally as tightly because she was wearing heels that he was not even sure how she walked with them because they were so high. But he knew that even if he was not there she was going to be able to walk and not lose her balance.

She would strut.

People walked up to her and even tried to touch her and she was indifferent to it all.

He never let her hand go, but he did want people to look at him while he was with her. He was with Alessandra Wagnall–he wanted her to be the star. 

And she was. 

When they got to the gallery, he did cringe a bit when he saw Rabekkah. He had set them up just months ago, and now he was with Alessa himself. It was awkward, but it was what was going to be if he was with her.

Rabekkah was classy and stamped their hands for admittance and the after-party like the professional she was. She looked at Leon for a long moment and then offered a soft smile.

But it was later when he saw Eliza that he froze. Alessa was harder to read as usual. Nothing ever showed on her face, the greatest poker face of them all except when Eliza had broken her heart. However, she looked remarkably calm and collected as they walked toward Eliza and Rafe.

And Oscar.

 

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Mirror

“I think Alessandra is your spirit animal,” Rafe said as he poured vermouth into their mason jars, and Eliza stared at him agape.

“What are you even saying?” she said, taking a sip of the vermouth and taking in its herbaceousness. 

Her husband looked at her, taking off his apron.

“I mean, I think she is something that you want to be. Something about her that you admire, and that is why you are so obsessed with her.”


“I am not obsessed with Alessandra!” she denied as she looked at him, finally closing her mouth. “I have been through a lot with her and more than I should have been through for someone who is just a friend, don’t you think so?”

“I do think so, Eliza, but that does not mean that you do not admire her. From the time she got involved with Oscar, you were jealous of her, and then you friended her, then you wanted her–”

“I never wanted her Rafe, let’s be very clear about that.”

He sighed.

“Look, all I know is there is something deeper here, and I am not sure what it is.”

“I know,” Eliza finally conceded. “I know that there is something deeper here, and I am not sure what it is either.” Rafe took a sip of his own vermouth, and then he kissed her forehead. Eliza put her arms around him. “I do not know what it is about her, but she just got to me, you know?”

“Yes,” he agreed. “I know.”

“I am actually glad she is with Leon. Going to shows and seeing her was a lot to contend with because she is not a small shot in the art world, and we were so close at one point…”


Eliza remembered Alessandra seeing her get involved with Emmanuel, and she knew at that point that Alessa knew something about her that she did not know about herself. She knew her too well, and that was what made her so close to her because she felt like she knew her like she was like her. She was more animal with Alessa than she had been before her, and she had never done some of the things that she did with her with anyone else. Not being friends with her anymore meant that someone knew who she really was who could use that against her, and it made her feel small. 

She thought that she had made the most profound human connection with someone that was now not a part of her life. Who else would she be that person with? Was she even herself with Alessa? Rafe was her husband, and that was a deep but different kind of connection. Jeanne was her sister, but that was something different too. Oscar was her lover. Bibi was her daughter. But Alessa had been her mirror.

 

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